Brief Fake Movie Trailer Interlude: Midnight Coterie of Sinister Intruders

I would watch the heck out of this. Love Edward Norton, personalized stationery for The Murderers, and turtleneck sweaters! Keep it coming, SNL. 

Top 5: Halloween Film Favorites

If you haven't already noticed, I'm kind of a morbid person. I always have been--my sisters can attest to this. And really, all three of us are pretty morbid...what with our bone collections and those bird feet and wings we have, from time to time, picked up in parking lots and Seattle street corners. (And just think, I wrote that days before Monika posted that dead bird picture.)

Home and Away: Bronson Caves

One definite perk of living just over the hills from Hollywood is that there are really neat landmarks everywhere you look! One of my favorites is Griffith Park. When you visit the park there are so many different areas to explore--it's home to the Hollywood sign, the inspiration for Disneyland, the Griffith Observatory, the old LA Zoo, and the Bronson Caves, just to name a few. So, in honor of the month that channels all thing spooky I think it's a great time to visit the caves... 

The Royal Nicolai's

via mint.com

On the 24th of July, I sent Catherine a text that ran along these lines: If we sisters were characters on The League, I'd be Kevin, you'd be Ruxin, and Monika would be Taco, I think.

Thus was born, the Who Would We Be? game, which Catherine and I have been playing ever since. We have covered:

Little Women: Catherine is Jo/Beth. Monika is Amy. I'm Meg. Actually, Catherine's precise words were: Little Women: easy. Monika is Amy. You're Meg. I'm Jo/Beth because I'm bossy and heart failure-y. 

Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, Monika is Sue Ellen. Catherine is Melissa. I'm Kenny.

Arrested Development: Catherine is Michael. Monika is Gob, and I'm Buster, of course.

Harry Potter: Catherine is Hermione. Monika is both Fred & George Weasley. I'm Neville.

Most of the time we reason it out like this: Catherine is the bossiest, the smartest, and the most responsible. Monika is fun, honest, and outgoing. I'm introverted, nice, and generally terrified. But we all have hearts of gold. Yes. Just like hookers. Nice hookers. Expensive. Discerning. Hey, did you know that call girls are the highest class of hookers? Sociology class taught me and Catherine this useful bit of intel. So, we basically have call girl hearts...

from above

Found this little gem via That Kind of Woman.  Utterly charming, right? Be honest. It is. 

Moonrise Kingdom

Are you as excited as I am?

Plus, did you see that kitten at the end? I can't even wait. 

Sunday, Sunday

I slept really late today. Really. Like to the point where I didn't know if I needed to start my day with breakfast or lunch. (Matilda had brunch.) That's what happens when you stay up late, especially when time suddenly jumps ahead on you. Still, all is well--today is the one day this week when I can sleep in, so kudos to me.


The plan was to spend my post-Bonnie & Clyde late night watching a good horror movie, but I couldn't really decide what I wanted, and also I have a tendency to allow myself to get really freaked out--off the deep end freaked out, like checking-in-the-closets, re-locking-the-doors-and-windows, staring-out-the-darkened-window-waiting-for-movement freaked out (with a sleepy cat beside me). So, I didn't end up watching a horror movie. Probably for the best because I ended up dreaming about being stuck in an abandoned school and having evil spirits try to take possession of my body while I slept. (Yup, dreaming about sleeping.) Furthering the dream terror was the dream fact the evil spirits took the form of several types of large worms, which attempted to burrow into my flesh. And just how to escape when the stairwell is crumbling away?


Yeah.


You might remember how utterly paranoid I am about anything burrowing into my body and incubating. Not cool. It wasn't exactly a restful night. So the super-daylight was welcome when I finally roused myself.


Hey, does that count as an entry in my Washington State Department of Dreams Dream Log? I think it does. One down. Only a million to go.


Since I've been thinking about the Milwaukee trip, I thought I'd add a couple photos taken at the Milwaukee Art Museum. I was sort of obsessed with hands that day.

This hand belongs to Alexander van der Capellen, 1626  as painted by Pieter Claesz. Soutman.

This hand belongs to Cardinal Antonio Sersale, 1750 as painted by Francesco de Mura.

These hands belong to Dr. Karl Schwarz, 1916 as painted by Lovis Corinth.

This hand belongs to Moses, 1648 (obviously, he didn't sit for this portrait).
Painted by Phillippe de Champaigne. 

These hands belong to St. Catherine and they mean business, the Lord's business.

If Napoleon if I told him if I told him if Napoleon.

What I should be doing tonight is working on a seriously overdue project and watching my Napoleon miniseries (John Malkovich as Talleyrand!), but that seems like such an assignment. I mean, I love projects, and I love Napoleon (He was made a general at 26!), but I've had those dvds from Netflix for like two weeks and haven't watched them yet. Too much pressure!


I mean, I know Josephine's real name was Rose (It was changed by Napoleon because he didn't like Rose.), and I know that she was 32 to his 26 (the general-making age) and she had bad (I mean, bad) teeth. But there are so many other things I don't know. (I also know the thing Napoleon said in that letter to Josephine about not bathing because he was coming home soon--learned that in 9th grade {Who didn't?}. Dirty birds.)


So, yes, I'm excited to learn through the power of the miniseries, but it's like seven hours long. That's a pretty big commitment for me.


In the meantime, I've spent my evening watching Bonnie and Clyde (excellent, in case you're wondering), marvelling at Warren Beatty's wonderfully unkempt hair (and unsettling laugh) and everything about Faye Dunaway. Oh! Also, Estelle Parsons plays Buck Barrow's wife, Blanche. Who is Estelle Parsons? Only Roseanne and Jackie's mother, Bev, from Roseanne! It took me a couple minutes to realize. I had to talk myself through--grating, dissatisfied yet superior voice--and then I had to have a moment of silence while I filtered through all the television mothers I could recall (because I knew enough to know that it was a mother voice). It was an exciting moment. I thought about calling someone.

I've also been doing a little bit of kick-back drinking. No biggie, but it did directly contribute to this next thing: me reading old myspace blogs and cracking up. Like this little gem from an October 2005 conversion with Catherine:


Her: "I've limited myself to drinking coffee on social outings only."
Me: "You're a social drinker?"
Her: "Yes, and this is social."
Me: "No, this is anti-social. Just because we're being anti-social together--"
Her: "Two wrongs don't make a right, but two negatives do make a positive...that's math."
Me: "Hah, we're two negatives."


Maybe it's just my current state, but that is hilarious.

I found this crab claw while walking along the lake in Milwaukee last summer.

I was thinking about it today. Poor little crabbin. (I know that isn't a word.)

Who comes first. Napoleon the first.

Top 10 of 2010: Movies

I'm going with a pretty loose definition of movies here because I'm also including television and mini-series. What? There's nothing wrong with that.


MOVIES:
1. John Adams, 2008 (Smart, funny, sad, wonderful, true.)
2. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, 1958 (Oh, man. Just watch it.)
3. North and South, 2004 (I'm in love with Richard Armitage.)
4. On the Waterfront, 1954 ("Charlie. Oh, Charlie." Breaks my heart.)
5. The West Wing, 1999-2006 (I love all these characters. So much.)
6. Sabrina, 1954 (Just a lovely little movie.)
7. Once Upon a Time in the West, 1968 (Kicked off my current love affair with westerns. And the music: perfect.)
8. Peter and the Wolf, 2006 (Stop motion {Yes!} set to Prokofiev's music.)
9. MST3K: Werewolf, 1998 (The best episode of MST3K ever?)
10. Up, 2009 (I cried so hard watching this. So awful. Still, great movie.)

Wow. I don't think I've ever used the word love, so many times in such a small amount of space. Hmm. I'll have to ponder that one.

And just what sort of picture might I have for you today?

Why, it's a bird's nest! 

I do not approve.

What exactly is this? And why is it mucking up my nostalgia trip?

No they didn't.

To be human again? No.
Belle reading Romeo and Juliet to the Beast? No.


This wasn't included in the original movie for a reason, Disney people. And that reason is that this sequence is stupid and unnecessary. Booooooooo.


And it makes me very grouchy. Thanks a lot, Disney jerks.
Booo.

Be. My. Guest.

"Beast, drawing the curtains aside, would walk in and talk so pleasantly that she soon lost much of her fear of him."

Tomorrow night, I will be watching Beauty and the Beast. Yes, it has been released from THE DISNEY VAULT. And I won't make the same mistake I made with The Little Mermaid. I will not rest until it is in my possession.


If you have some time to kill (and of course you do {because you're reading this}), you should do the following things:


1) Go to the Disney Store. This website features, in equal parts, items that leave me giddy and terrified. This is, for me, the essence of Disney.

2) Start following crazymissdaisy on youtube. She is from Denmark; she has a Disney doll collection; she makes some of the best Disney tribute videos around. Do not dispute me on this one. Just allow yourself to fall in love with Disney Girls Say: SHUT UP.

They'll raid us again!

Stock photo of Raccoon outside our bedroom window from April(ish)

Seriously, don't. Thursday night the tree fell, Saturday morning the window broke, and Tuesday morning (4:50 a.m.) a raccoon watched me sleep. I woke up because I heard noises. Most people probably wouldn't be surprised to read that. I'm always hearing noises and thinking that someone is going to do something to me or the house or my cats (cat murderers). I lay in bed awake for a minute. I could tell right away that the raccoons were on the roof again. We have a big pear tree next to the house and it reaches well above the second story where our bedroom is (see above). The raccoons climb this tree or the fir tree on the other side of the house and they run all over the roof. It causes quite a ruckus for just being raccoons. I roll over to the very edge of the bed, open my eyes, and I see 26 inches (I measured) away from my face a raccoon looking right at me! The window was open, so there was only a screen and the aforementioned 26 inches between me and what could have been an assault. I didn't scream. It was more of a whimper. I sat up and started to close the window. The raccoon scurried away when it saw me move, but as I was closing the window three raccoons came running at it!!! Three! Raccoons! The window shut and the raccoons started sniffing at the glass and standing up smell the air. It was freaky. Because of all the commotion, they went into hyper speed and really starting running around the roof. I was freaked out. I called Nick. I don't think he thought it was a big deal, but it really was.
A couple of things that make me think of movies from this incident/post.
1) Whenever I say "it really was" I think of Titanic and the part when old Rose says, "Titanic was called the ship of dreams, and it was. It really was." Don't ask me why.
2) Jurassic Park (JP for Nic). Two different scenes with raptors quickly came to mind during my battle. Both scenes took place in the kitchen with the raptors. The first one is when Lex was in the cabinet and she was trying to shut the door before the raptor ate her. Total parallelism. The second was when they needed to hold the door shut until the locks reactivated. Good stuff.
This also reminds me that the other night Christine text me something great.

Yeah, that happened!

3) Last movie connection, and it's probably the most important. Now I don't expect that everyone has seen Grey Gardens but everyone should. The most important things I learned about raccoons, I learned from Grey Gardens. I would so put that magnet on my fridge. A couple general rules to follow: don't feed them loaves of bread and don't let them steal books from your room because if you do they will eat your walls!

Great movie.

I think I hear them on the roof right now...sigh. At least I bought a flashlight.